February
/ March 2006
Dear Friends,
So, how has life been with you? It seems the last
two months has been 'crunch time' for many people,
where we may have come to the end of the road with
certain situations, workloads or lifestyles that
have become unsustainable or intolerable. Some may
have manifested serious financial and/or legal situations
or health warnings. For many, this last two months
has been a strong, much needed, wake-up call.
How many of us, I wonder, have got to the point of
feeling "I simply can't go on like this any
longer"? Whether 'this' has meant a situation,
a continuous heavy workload, or a negative or fearful
outlook in relation to money, our health, ourselves
or life. Whatever 'this' has been, many of us have
really decided "enough! - I really have come
to the end of this".
It is as though we are now at a choice point - What
do we fundamentally believe about ourselves and about
the nature of reality? Do we believe we are powerful
creators, with the ability to create loving, joyful
lives, or do we believe that we are just victims
of what life throws at us, doomed to increasingly
struggle our way through life?
The Great Armchair Abundance Experiment
Since early January I have been really realising
just exactly how we create our reality through what
we think, feel and believe about ourselves and about
life. I have come to understand how rapidly this
occurs and how almost instantly we can change our
reality, by changing the way we think and feel about
a situation.
I made up my mind recently to begin a living experiment
of manifestation - to watch my daily thoughts, feelings
and beliefs, to see how I'm thinking, feeling and
responding throughout the day, and what manifests
in my experience as a result of that - to become
more conscious and to make conscious choices about
how I respond to life. More and more, I have come
to see and understand, both from quantum physics,
and from my own experience, that this is not a 'physical'
world, and that our reality arises as a direct response
to our thoughts and feelings, as the 'Observer' and
creator of our lives.
My first, and ongoing experiment in allowing '*unreasonable'
abundance and limitless possibilities and opportunities,
into my life, began in my armchair in my office.
Sitting comfortably in this little armchair, with
my feet up on my office chair, I began breathing
gently, joyfully and expansively into my current
negative thoughts and worries - gradually allowing
more and more goodness, light and wonder to fill
my experience, expanding and expanding this light
until I was completely luxuriating in a feeling of
unspecified but unlimited, wonderful abundance, happening
right now in my life. ('*unreasonable' abundance,
being that which we can't possibly imagine with our
small mind, as to 'how' it will come about ).
Whenever I encountered feelings of resistance, pessimism
or disbelief, I gently breathed into these areas
of limitation, and expanded into them with joy -
saying "There are no limits to the goodness
and wonder that I can allow myself to experience.
I can experience this much good, and more, and more
and more. It can be this wonderful, and even more
wonderful still, and yes, I am worth it, and I don't
even need to know how this goodness will come to
me or in what form - I will just enjoy this wonderful
feeling - breathing deeply and peacefully into every
cell of my being and beyond and beyond - spreading
joy, light and wonder rippling out with laughter
across the Universe".
I imagined how my life would be and feel , if anything
were possible - if this is really heaven, and we
really are divine creators, how would I live? I allowed
myself the luxury of feeling what it would be like
to relax into continuously feeling I had 'enough'
time and 'enough' abundance to live my life joyfully,
peacefully, wonderfully and lovingly every day.
The first time I sat and relaxed into this blissful
imagining. I emerged, wonderfully relaxed, from having
spent a whole hour without a single worried, stressful
or pessimistic thought, and without any of those
crushing 'it's not possible - I can't' 'how am I
going to manage' feelings. I decided it was worth
repeating every day, if only for the wonderful relaxation
and joy I had experienced, and the relief from worry
and stress.
What I genuinely hadn't expected was the almost instant
feedback I would receive from the Universe! Within
half an hour of getting up from this blissful peace,
the phone rang and that one call, out of the blue,
brought me some unexpected well paid work from a
totally surprising source. I had been wondering how
I could raise the money for the next tank of central
heating oil - and hey presto! "Interesting",
I thought, "I'd better try this again tomorrow
and see what happens then - My sceptical self thought
it was probably unconnected to my blissful time -
perhaps a one-off fluke".
The next day I really cranked up the energy and had
a great time expanding the boundaries of my perception
even further, to allow even more wonder, abundance
and joy into my life - without specifying exactly
how or what - just experiencing the wonderful feeling
of having enough time and abundance to really enjoy
life - time to relax and garden - and the time, opportunity
and abundance to travel and to interact more with
others around the world. This session I only spent
half an hour in my armchair - I was getting quicker
at connecting with this joy! Within an hour of getting
out of my chair from this session, I received a totally
unsolicited phone call, from a complete stranger,
who placed a large essence order, there and then,
and paid for it over the phone.
Every 'armchair' session since, after getting up
from my blissful imaginings - the phone has rung,
sometimes once, sometimes several times, and each
call has brought me both unexpected and 'unreasonable'
abundance and opportunities. I now really notice
if I am blocking the flow, by falling back into old
habits of pessimism or worry, and how quickly I can
change my mind and turn around these feelings, into
lightness and joy, allowing all my goodness to flow
towards me.
This ongoing experiment has been a revelatory experience
for me. Over the years I have explored and dealt
with many issues around my abundance. I could see
that throughout my life, all my needs have been met,
but always it seemed, only just in time, and only
just enough - it always felt like it had that knife-edge
quality to it.
I could also see the times when I had clearly manifested
my dreams wonderfully, and other times when I had
really got into allowing abundance to flow in my
life, but somehow, up until now, I have never managed
to make this an ongoing, continuous life reality.
By observing my daily thoughts and feelings around
abundance, I am learning a lot about how and why
we block the flow of goodness in our lives, through
scepticism, pessimism, guilt, not feeling 'worthy'
or 'deserving' enough, fear of others' jealousy or
envy, fear of being noticed, concerns about becoming
'materialistic' or 'greedy' etc..
An Abundance of Time
Like many working mothers and women running their
own business or practice, I have struggled each day
with feeling as though there is never 'enough' time,
to enable me to do all the things I need or want
to do. It's as though I'm always chasing my tail
and never catching up, always feeling 'behind' with
things. I'd reach the end of each day feeling a failure
for not having managed to achieve my goals within
the time framework I had set myself, or which I had
allowed others to set for me. Sometimes, for weeks
at a time, I have turned around my experience, and
have really lived according to the loving flow of
life's real timing, and life has become wondrous
and magical, but somehow I always seem to slip back
into the old work-based, time-stressed ways of experiencing
life.
I know, that time is a matter of perception, and
does not exist as a literal structure, except within
our 3D, 'rational' perception, and I have experienced
this powerfully at times in the last few years. So
this last week or two, once again, I have been playing
with time, and my perceptions and experience of time,
and I have begun to allow myself to feel increasingly,
that there is 'plenty of time' to achieve everything
I want to achieve, joyfully, peacefully and without
stress.
As I go about my day, I've been practising luxuriating
in a feeling of limitless abundance of time, and
somehow time has appeared to stretch. Whenever I've
dropped into this space of infinite time, I've achieved
whatever I've needed to do, in a wonderful, relaxed
way, and have somehow also found magical blocks of
'spare time' appearing throughout my day! I'm still
playing with this one. I notice how easily I fall
back into feeling that there's a 'lack' of time,
and into feeling stressed and guilty about how I
use my time - and whether I'm being 'productive'
all the time! It's so interesting what we find out
about our underlying mental and emotional imprinting,
once we begin to watch our thoughts and feelings!
An Abundance of Health
My next ongoing experiment has been with allowing
myself to feel an abundance of wonderful health and
wellbeing. Now my health has been pretty good these
last few years, particularly the last two years,
but like many women, I realise I often fall into
thinking negatively and guiltily about my body and
my health. This is particularly the case if I've
been overworking and getting tired, not exercising
or resting enough, and resorting to comfort eating.
Earlier this week, for the first time in two years,
I could feel myself coming down with a cold/flu virus.
I'd also got chilled in the biting cold wind we've
been having here this week and was feeling increasingly
under the weather. All my deepest unresolved traumas,
fears and feelings of vulnerability from past experiences
of illness surfaced, and I (inevitably!) began to
feel more ill by the moment.
I suddenly clocked what I was doing, and consciously
began breathing peace and joy into every pore of
my being, settling down my frightened inner child,
and laughing this 'illness' away. Within 10 minutes
I felt completely well again - so powerful and so
quick - and all because I had changed my perceptions
and feelings. I had stopped resisting and running
scared, and had settled instead into a feeling of
deep peace and joy, wholeness and empowerment.
Join the Experiment!
The experiment continues. Every day I am watching
my thoughts and feelings, and watching what creates
my experience, and asking myself what I really believe
to be true. Why not try playing with this yourselves
on a daily basis. It is definitely not hard work!
Quite the opposite!. The key things to remember are:
* this is not a 'physical' world. We are not 'physical'.
According to Kate Nowak (see link at the end of the
Ramblings) there is as much material matter in our
bodies as will fit on the head of a pin. All the
rest of our being is moving intelligent energy -
the same is so for all 'matter', whether it would
be considered 'animate' or inanimate'.
* Remember, it's the feeling that accompanies our
thoughts and beliefs, that changes our experience
and our reality. Change our feelings - and we change
our experience, internally and externally. Breathe
into your feelings and expand into them with great
peace and joy.
* This is not about a denial of 'reality' What, after
all, is 'reality? Two people's experience of the
same situation can be poles apart, depending on their
feelings and reactions. It's not about avoidance
or denial of 'negative' or fearful thoughts and feelings.
Remember - "What we embrace transforms - what
we resist persists".
The Universe reflects back to us whatever we are
thinking and feeling, both negatively and positively.
If we are putting energy into not wanting something,
then the Universe reflects back to us whatever energy
we are energising, - even if it's an 'I don't want
that'. So, whatever it is that we are upset by, or
don't want, if instead of resisting our experience
of it, we breathe into our feeling of it, allow it
to expand with light, joy and peace, it will transform
into something wondrous. This is the process of transformation
and miracles
* Really get into the feeling of allowing yourself
to experience this wonderful peace and joy right
now. Throughout the day, notice when you are allowing
the energy to really flow joyously and unreasonably,
and notice when you clamp down in scepticism, anxiety
or pessimism. Notice too when we block our abundance
because we don't feel 'good enough' to deserve it,
or because we are afraid to have more than others
in case it sets us apart from them, or in case we
attract jealousy and envy. (See the description of
'In the Light of Goodness' below). Try breathing
into these feelings and really getting the energy
flowing again.
* We don't have to 'work' at it. It doesn't take
much time, of thinking and feeling differently, for
things to really begin to change. Even 5 minutes
of unlimited, joyous, peaceful feeling, one or twice
a day can really begin to change our lives.
There's a bit in the Bible which says "If ye
have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say
unto this mountain, Remove ye hence to yonder place
and it shall remove and nothing shall be impossible
unto you". Christ seemed to be pointing out
to us, that it only takes a very small amount of
faith to change our world completely.
There's also that lovely bit in the bible about "Consider
the lilies of the field. They neither sow nor reap.
They toil not, neither do they spin: and yet I say
unto you, that even Solomon in all his glory, was
not arrayed as one of these".
So, please join me in experimenting, if you feel
so inclined, and let me know how you get on!
with love and best
wishes to one & all
Rose
